GZ H3 Run #1063 21 August 2010

GZ H3 Run #1063 Hared by Mi Lao Shu and Soggy Biscuit (who suddenly realized that he had been "volunteered" to assist the night before the hash.) With as much as 12 hours of advance preparation before them they quickly decided that to set a run worthy of two of the most senior members (both as runners and as hares) was to do only one thing: Go to Faceplant Square and hope for the best! Using close to 14 minutes of their 15 minute head start to decide where to go, they got away from the bus and headed out to find a trail. Using their keen sense of direction and dozens upon dozens of previous runs in this area they set out to set a complicated mix of trail running, hill climbing, tricky checkbacks, and frustrating false trails to keep the enterprising group of 29 hashers together on a hot summer day. But as with many hashes the result was no where near what was envisioned! Through the hills of the faceplant square area these two found possibly the flatest area of Guangzhou outside of Zhu Jiang Xian Cheng! Flat uneventful trails well suited to trail running and some obvious places where the hares clearly got confused and had to backtrack to stay ahead of the pack but ultimately coming into the grasp of......hunk-a-spunk and Pippi Ugly Stocking. Obviously something going on there if these two are not only front running but also tracking down the hares. Back at Faceplant we had the luxury of relaxing next to our new Hash transport. As a result of the discovery that our previous bus driver was supplementing his generous hash salary by stealing our beer he was quickly fired and replaced. But it was noted that the decision to fire him was not made based on his stealing Pink Panzer's cell phone (hey he was only trying to make a living) but taking hash beer without paying 50 kuai was something that Soggy felt necessitated the ultimate punishment.....no more enjoying Saturday's dragging a bunch of drunk malcontents around the Pearl River Delta!!!!!! New driver seems like a nice guy and the bus is the best we've seen. The circle? Yes, guess we had one and this resulted in the naming of our dear German friend, Helmut. Forever forward on all hashes around the world he will be know by the hash name bestowed upon him that day by Soggy Biscuit: Boogie Night. Due to his constant use of video movie camera to capture all the porno happenings on the run and the circle to include looking for spare long dark sausages in Chic Shiek's pants (you know those crazy Germans!)